Can you get pregnant by masturbating?

i know this question is like, reallly reallllly stupid but i just wanted to know if i can get pregnant by masturbating? it's weird cause i already know the fact that i cant get pregnant by it but i've been feeling really weird and bloated and everything. and i usually miss my period but then it comes like, later on. and i've been masturbating with my vibrator. and the dumbest thing is that i do it with my pj's on! lol and yeah, i've been going paranoid so pls help! and my stomach hurts a lot and idk what to do. and i never threw up, so i guess it's a no.